An Expedition

An orange figure resolved out of the brown turbidity of this stretch of river, cutting closer through the swirling currents faster than seemed possible from the unbothered pace of his fluttering fins. “Have you seen Baby around? Pretty sure he was supposed to help me with scouting the forks coming up upstream, but I never saw him.”

Audacious giggled with a roll of her pale eyes. “Oh, I think you can guess.”

“That’s…” Dorito trailed off, gills flaring with a sigh. “I don’t like making assumptions. No worries, it’s done now anyways.”

“My, you’re clever enough for two! Those map-songs are so hard to understand even without the river’s changes. I could never.”

“You’re a clever lady - smarter than me, I’ll bet. It just takes practice. If you’re living in a settlement and not traveling, you don’t have enough practice to get good at it, but you could, easy. … Baby Precious could, if he put in the effort to learn.”

A burst of bubbles puffed from Audacious’s nose, glittering like the pearls she draped precisely around her antlers. “I cannot believe that boy. I don’t know if he’s ever lifted a fin to do anything but goof around! That sweet lady spoiled him too much - Herne bless her memory.”

The irony seemed lost on her. Dorito kept his amusement to himself. He hadn’t exactly seen Audacious volunteering to help out. Thank Herne, he thought, that they’re not all like this in the Antler Islands, or this expedition would have failed days ago. “That lady?”

“You know, his primary caretaker. The little ones need someone who volunteers to look after them when everyone’s asleep. She was a lovely woman, absolutely darling! But I’ll be honest with you - and don’t go repeating this, I don’t want to start any gossip and especially not about the dearly departed, but you’re so not the gossiping type so I think it’s alright to keep this between us - I think she got a bit lonely in her old age and she favoured each successive fawn she took in a little more. I don’t think he ever heard a ‘no’!” Audacious rattled off like she was reading him in, eyes darting around wary of eavesdroppers.

“When did she pass?” Dorito hoped, gut squirming, that he wasn’t being hard on a child wrestling with life after their first life-changing loss.

“It’s been… oh, it must be two and a quarter years now. I remember it was Upwelling at the continental shelf when we  travelled out for the ceremony. Returning her to the depths - do your people do that? Oh, it was a beautiful upwelling day for it, very sad, but you could just see the life returning to us from past ceremonies and really, really feel, like, why it’s so important to honour someone that we make the long trip out for it.”

“Ah. Yeah, I know other folks who do funerals like that. Who’s raising the fawn now?”

“The village, like all the other fawns - well, the teachers, mostly. Baby Precious was past the age of needing a primary caretaker even then. Oh, but - I’m not saying that we stop loving our caretakers when we grow up! It’s terrible to lose them at any age.”

“Of course. To be honest, I don’t get how her raising could be to blame f-,“ Audacious’s eyes widened in mortified alarm and she looked ready to erupt into clarifications “- bad word choice, I get you don’t mean to blame her. But I mean, shouldn’t fawns being raised by so many folks, and mostly the same folks, not be so influenced by one caretaker when they were younger? Shouldn’t he have heard plenty of ‘no’s and tough lessons from teachers by now?”

“Well, he sure should have!”

“I suppose we should lay down the law about him playing hooky on this,” Dorito sighed. He hadn’t thought he signed up for becoming a disciplinarian when he agreed to teach the young ones about navigation.

“Yes, we should. We will! I know you’re a nice boy, maybe too nice for this sort of conversation, so don’t you worry. I’ll be right here to take him to account with you - or without you, if need be,” Audacious finished with a wink and a tap of her hoof on his shoulder.

“No, no, I’ll tell him, you don’t need to do it for me.”

Giggles and murmurs swiftly grew louder, heralding the appearance of the school of merfawns travelling as part of the Antler Islands diplomatic mission. Some paddled and swished along listlessly, daydreaming about going home or reaching their destination - or at least reaching lunch. Others played and shouted and chased each other in a rowdy ruckus, probably just as tired of the long forward march they were supposed to take seriously. All of them were old enough to be trying their hardest not to seem associated with any adult faun trying to check in on them. Except for one, it seemed.

Baby Precious twirled through the water with the bliss and graceful energy of a plodder without even a concept of responsibilities. When he caught sight of the fauns watching, he smiled at them and broke off from his friends with quick, playful goodbyes.

“Hi Miss Audacious and Mister Dorito, are we making camp soon? You should get time to relax and enjoy the river, it could be a once in a lifetime experience getting to explore here - like, it’s been so long since anyone charted a passage this far inland, isn’t it crazy we get to? I’m sorry I couldn’t make it to shadow you, Mister Dori, us kids are just so so tired and I really didn’t want to get in the way and slow you down.”

“That’s… that’s okay…” Dorito realized while struggling for words that the forgiveness he had agreed not to give was out of his mouth and he still didn’t know what else he could say. He did feel for the young ones who had never swam distance like this before.

Audacious looked at Dorito with a sort of knowing pity, then back. “Well, look, Baby, it’s - oh, I know it’s tough. But it really isn’t okay to leave poor Dorito waiting for you, not knowing if you were going to show or whether to look for you because something was really wrong, and then working all on his own wondering!”

“Sorry, I never thought of that! Augh, I can be really stupid. Wow, are we ever lucky that we have people like you around to keep us safe and let us be kids who mess up all the time. Like, man, you’re so good at this stuff! You must have done so much swimming against currents and around obstacles trying to chart the path, and you  still look so nice and cool and put-together. Thanks for being patient with me, Miss Audi, you’re really good at teaching lessons like that while being really nice - also your scales are so glittery and pretty.”

“Ah, you think so?” Audacious smiled bashfully, “I do try to speak my mind kindly. I just want to help people out with a little bluntness when it’s needed, you know.”

“Totally! Thanks again. Bye!” Baby Precious twirled off, long fins rippling like silk with his lackadaisical twists. One fawn nudged her friend and the two of them giggled and watched him with keen adolescent interest.

“I don’t think we laid down the law very well,” Dorito observed, trying to work out what happened in that conversation and how he felt about it.

“Oh, he’s not a bad kid,” Audacious sighed, “he’s just…”

“He’s just…”

“He’s something, alright.” Audacious laughed.